The salamander was having a perfect day under its damp rock… until a certain archmage from the hero's party made two mistakes in quick succession:

The first was trying to summon the Fire Dragon King Salamander during a pinch.

The second was failing at it and summoned the salamander instead, which introduced a blade to her internal organs.

In desperation, she used the salamander as a catalyst for Merge Flesh. The spell worked. She died anyway. The salamander did not get a vote on any of this.

The system arrived. It reviewed the situation. It gave her new skills:

[WATER AFFINITY]

[REGENERATION]

Her heart regenerated. She remembered breathing.

[CLIMBING MASTERY]

[LONG TONGUE]

A fly buzzed past.

Food/Disgusting, she thought both at the same time.

What followed was a three-way argument in one body that has not meaningfully resolved since:

The salamander wants to put a rock over her head and eat bugs.

The human brain wants to remain an archmage and retain some dignity.

The system's official position:

[SHE DOESN’T HAVE THE INTELLIGENCE TO BE AN ARCHMAGE. WE WATCHED HER EAT THE BEETLE.]

🪲 Isekai, LitRPG, and Progression with progressively worse decisions.

🦎 Weak to Strong MC.

📚 A world inspired by Terry Pratchett.

Fire Dragon? I'm a Salamander!

Performance over time